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  • 3 ways you might be sabotaging your Emotional Intelligence

    Why is it that being Emotionally Intelligent such a mainstream popular mantra right now? You often hear how important it is to become emotionally intelligent, to practice EQ and/or to enhance your EI, but why? What’s all the hype about❓❓❓

    Well, learning to increase your emotional intelligence setpoint drastically impacts all aspects of your life, including (but not limited to) your work performance, finances, communication skills, the ability to empathize, and reason. 🏆

    Learning to become more emotionally intelligent 💡allows you to be less emotionally reactive because you are better able to self-manage yourself. Think about how powerful this skill is?!?

    If you had the ability to not get emotionally sucked into drama, to not take things so personal, to be able to challenge your assumptions, expectations, and perceptions! You would be an unstoppable force of good in your life! And that’s exactly what learning to become emotionally intelligent 💡can do for you!

    Sound hella interesting?! Then watch this week’s episode of Mind Right Monday and learn 3 ways you might be sabotaging your emotional intelligence 💡 and some tips to turn that shit around!

    On a side note, I feel like I need to be 100% honest… just watching this video or reading a book isn’t actually going to be enough to make you emotionally intelligent… In fact, it takes a lot more time, discipline, and work to accomplish that.

    If this is a skill you honestly KNOW you need to learn, well then do something about it! Join my Over It Academy and start reclaiming your life. Class has already started but it’s not too late to join, Click HERE to learn more.

    Until next week, keep being awesome!

    XOXO Bonnie Kelly

     

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  • 3 things that are misleading about emotional intelligence

    Good Morning Friend!

    Boy-o-boy am I ready for work today! You might not know this, but I have been on a mental and emotional timeout this whole last week! Yet… a much need, mandatory break.

    I wish I could say that it was planned or that I was the one who ordered this break… but I didn’t. In-fact it was my coach, executive coordinator (Cassie) and husband who all banished me from work for a week! HAHA! 😂

    Now, I can safely say I am not normally a workaholic, but this past year… I kinda was. We had BIG goals and ambitions to reach the next level, with deadlines, and projects that demanded my attention. Week’s turned into months, and months turned into over a year of non-stop work work work!

    If you can imagine… I hit a wall. AND BOY WAS IT AN UGLY ONE! I became agitated by everything, started having panic attacks because the housekeeper was vacuuming and became an over stressed cookoo bird! 🐦

    My emotional fuel tank was on ‘E’ and I became reactive to EVERYTHING! Sound very emotionally intelligent of me? NOPE! Not in the slightest… and that’s normal.

    I am an emotionally intelligent teacher, and a damn good one if I say so myself, and I am also a human having a very human experience. This means I, like everyone else have emotional experiences. I get overwhelmed, upset, hurt, sad, angry and stressed just like you.

    The difference (typically) is that I became aware and course correct and self-manage my behavior to have a conscious reaction vs. an unconscious one. Last week, was the exception to this. I had pushed myself too far, ignored the warning signs, didn’t do much self-care and as a result burned out. HAHA! 😂

    And it sucked!! HAHA! Just like it does when it happens in your life, but I chose to do something about it. I chose to course correct, to delegate, to recharge my self-care and trust that it is all unfolding in it’s proper time. As a result, I have reconnected to my joy, love, and gratitude. 💕

    I share this with you this week for you to truly see that what the mainstream tells you about being emotionally intelligent, can be misleading. It’s not a fixed place of achievement. 🏆

    It’s a constant evolvement of yourself and what life offers.🌱 With that said, I will say, that learning emotional intelligence, you will have less reactions and much more emotionally control, so it is worth the investment to learn.

    Check out this week’s video and learn 3 ways that mainstream media says becoming emotionally intelligent, can be misleading.

    Until next week, keep being awesome!

    Bonnie Kelly

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  • 3 Ways Your Assumptions Are Making An Ass Of You & Me

    Good Morning My Dear Friend and happy Mind Right Monday!

    This past week I was blessed enough to attend a wonderful mastermind with some pretty outstanding women in San Diego. Each time I attend these 3-day business intensives I am blown away by what I learn and how much my business grows.

    As of today, I am a die-hard fan of my little group, but it wasn’t always this way. In fact, during the start my ego and assumptions were OUT-OF-CONTROL! 😂

    I know, it’s hard to believe, but I mean it! You may not know this about me but I have had to work very hard over the years to reason with my pride (also known as the ego). I don’t know if it comes from my ancestors or my father, but I am a very prideful people 😂

    Actually, if I am being completely honest, it comes from my old negative core belief of looking stupid. This old paradigm is still present, though I have worked vigorously to transform it, it still exists to some degree.

    Growing up I always was accused of being stupid, looking stupid, acting stupid, and saying stupid things. As you can imagine, this hurts! Both emotionally and mentally this caused me pain and as a result, I became hyper sensitive to people implying, alluding too, mentioning, or even if I was in a position to be “less than them”. If my brain perceived they were smarter, or that they thought less of me, I would become very prideful as a way of puffing myself up like a peacock trying to attract a mate.

    During this inauthentic dance, I wasn’t able to learn anything, it kept me distant and stuck in my pride…. Not the best mindset for growth. Well, sure enough, when I first started with my Mastermind group, this is exactly what I did. I strutted my stuff all puffed up like I was the 💣 BOMB!

    🍀 Luckily for me, both my coach and I quickly identified where my assumptions were causing the disconnect. Quickly I was able to transform my inner world so that I could have a completely different outer world experience.

    You would be surprised at how often your assumptions are calling the shots in your life. Today I challenge you to change this pattern and do something different! To help you along this journey, I encourage you to watch this week’s video and learn 3 ways your assumptions are making an ass of you and me!

    Until next time, keep being awesome!

    XXO- Bonnie Kelly

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  • 5 Signs You Are Emotionally Intelligent

    Have you ever wondered if you are emotionally intelligent or not? Or maybe you are looking for a few ways you can enhance your emotional intelligence. If so, this week’s episode is for you!

    Emotional Intelligence is a pretty buzzy word 🐝 in business right now. Fortune 500 companies are talking about it, hundreds of books have it in their titles, and thousands of coaches are getting certified with this skill. But why? What’s all the hype about?!

    Well, first, emotional intelligence is a skill that serves all aspects of your life, not just your professional one. It is a study of thyself, triggers, perceptions and self-awareness that allows you to not only be less reactive but also have better self-management.

    I often talk about helping you get out of your way so that you can get on with your life, well, this skill is one of these killer ways to help you accomplish this!

    🌟 Imagine not being so reactive at work, with your kids, or spouse! To be able to not get emotionally knocked to your knees when life kicks you in the butt.

    🌟 Imagine being able to not have your emotions driving your decisions and moving forward with a clear, calm, logical mind.

    🌟 Imagine having the confidence to navigate whatever life throws at you with ease and peace of mind.

    All of these can be accomplished through the mastery of emotional intelligence. Through the mastery of thyself. 🏆

    I personally am a personal dev junkie! 🙌

    I LOVE 💖 learning about myself and why I do, say, react in the way that I do. I understand that the more I learn about me and my triggers, the less they will affect me when keeping a cool head is necessary.

    In this week’s episode, I talk about the 5 signs that you may be emotionally intelligent. It’s a killer video, but it really is just the tip of the iceberg. If mastering YOU is on your agenda this year, then check out my mastery program by clicking HERE. We start today and it’s not too late to join us for this year-long life altering event.

    Until Next Week, Keep Being Awesome!

    XOXO- Bonnie Kelly

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  • Why is everyone look happier than me? Tips To Increase Your Happiness

    Hi Friend!! 

    If I am being 100% honest and you are willing to meet me there, I think we both can change some shit today!

    Have you ever noticed yourself feeling like 💩 crap after scrolling on social media? Your friends are always smiling, hanging out, going on adventures. Their kids look perfect, their husbands are so loving, and they are always eating so healthy! After spending 20-minutes looking at everyone else’s joy, it can be easy to start thinking your life sucks!

    HAHA – I mean let’s get real… Sometimes even my life sucks. 😱 I struggle, my spouse and I fight, I lose money, I make money, I smile, I cry, I laugh, and sometimes my life is boring! But, that is real… Yet what you see of me on social media is only ½ the truth!

    Now why is this?

    Why is everyone posting only the perfect pieces of their lives and not the shitty parts? Well, in my opinion there are 2- reasons, but, before I get there, I want to get real about the other truth. There are those people who do post all the crap, drama, BS, hate, sadness that is going on in their lives, but honestly at the core, I believe it’s for the same reasons as those of us who only want to post the good… #1 We want attention, love, affection and connection and #2 are afraid of not having it.  

    Let’s face it! We are community people and want to be connected, loved, admired, appreciated and respected by our community and we usually “feel it” when people acknowledge us. And the truth is we get acknowledged both for the good and the hurt. 👏

    Over the years I have learned that getting attention or acknowledgement for my hurt isn’t the type of affection that I desire and thus created my only posting happy shit in my life habit! I like connecting with my peers on the good things in my life and reserving the crap for those closest to me.


    Does this make me wrong or bad or even fake?!?!? HECK NO! I am healthy with healthy boundaries! 🙌 I choose not to emotionally vomit the hard times all over everyone in my life… HAHA – I reserve this for a select few. But, with that being said, this can give an illusion to the world that my life is perfect when it’s not.

    Now, don’t get me wrong… I am truly happy 90% of the time and don’t often have drama in my life, but that is because I have worked through my own shit and have a high level of emotional intelligence. 💣 But under no circumstances does that mean I am picture perfect, nor is anyone else in this world!

    WE ARE HUMAN!!! And thus, we are flawed and imperfect. 👌 The sooner you can get 100% honest with yourself about this, embrace it and fall in love with you, the sooner your happiness will start to drastically improve. Don’t believe me?? Than check out this week’s Mind Right Monday Episode and learn some other killer tips on how to increase your happy!

    And, if you are finally at that stage in your life where you are completely committed to getting OVER YOUR SHIT! Than call me and let’s talk about options we have available for you. Your training starts in just a few week’s and this is one course you are not going to want to miss!

    I hope you have an epically Happy week! Don’t forget, life is what you make it, so make it a great one!

    💖 XOXO -Bonnie Kelly

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  • 4 Biggest YOU Blocks that are sabotaging your success

    Let’s get real… you are in your own way! Your mindset, beliefs, past experiences, fear, expectations, and assumptions are just a few things that block you from having, achieving, and accomplishing things in your life.

    We spend weeks, years, and in most cases decades allowing these limitations to hinder our lives and sabotage our dreams. 😢 I, for one have been there, done that! But no more! 💪 See the difference between me and most people in this world (and I suspect you too aren’t like most people) I’m willing to do something to change!

    💡 Knowing our insecurities and limitations isn’t doing anything about it. Taking action, learning the how’s and why’s, and stretching outside our comfort zone is what will allow you to not settle.

    The truth is, you deserve a great life, correction, you deserve an epic life! And you can have one if YOU get out of your own way! Stop allowing your excuses of not enough time, money, energy, or support to block you from achieving! YOU CAN HAVE MORE!

    Believe me when I say… IT IS POSSIBLE! 🙌 Check out this week’s episode and learn about 4 big YOU blocks that are sabotaging your success and if you are inspired to DO SOMETHING more with your life, then check out my OVER IT ACADEMY by clicking HERE and schedule 20-minutes free with me and let’s talk about how this 1-year long program is exactly what you need. (Click HERE to schedule)

    💣 Truth Bomb! You already know if you want to work with me or not. So be honest with yourself and challenge whatever excuses and limiting thoughts that are stopping you. Instead of thinking of all the ways you can’t do it, try shifting your attention to discovering 5-ways you can. This moves you from fear into inspired action!

    There is only 2-weeks left of open enrollment. Schedule an appointment today and let’s talk because life’s too short to live miserably.

    Until next week, keep being awesome!

    XOXO- BK

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  • Transforming Your Story From Victim To Victory!

    Good morning friend!

    I think the universe has a funny way of ironically teaching valuable lessons. As I opened my computer from my father’s hospital room in Raleigh North Carolina to start working on my Mind Right Monday Volg, go figure today is the day I am talking about victim to victory.

    Earlier last week my father almost died. I know, scary right! My father for those of you who haven’t read my book is my hero and is the person you all can thank for the women you know today.

    He is healthy, vibrant, and active ‘young-old’ man who has no prior health conditions, but during a routine outpatient procedure everything went wrong. The doctors were in shock that a stent which was placed in his leg travelled to his heart and started ripping through his heart wall, calling for a major life-threatening open heart surgery. There has only ever been 2 reported cases of this in history!

    The doctors were in shock. After the initial chaos of the travelling 1st stent, they took some pictures to find the other one was also on the move! This called for another risky operation and a second 1 and ½ foot scar!

    There are so many reasons why my father should be dead right now, but God had other plans. The doctors here are calling him ‘the miracle man’ since he has defied all odds. (Not surprising if you know my father lol).

    I share this with you to prove a point. I want you to check in right now… Yes, right now and tell me how you feel.

    Pause right now and check into your feelings.

    Are you feeling sorry for me or my father?

    Are you feeling sorry for yourself as this reminds you of something in your life?

    Are you feeling grateful?

    Are you feeling empathetic or sympathetic?

    Honestly, how do you feel?

    The reason I ask you this is for you to see if you have slipped down into victim (which is pretty easy to do when things are difficult). But knowing where your energy is going is key to keeping you out of victim and helping you step into a more empowered life.

    All week long I have had the opportunity to be victimised.  With almost losing the man I adore, admire and respect, it would be understandable to feel sorry for myself, to get lost in grief and feel comforted by everyone who expresses their sympathy. But by doing so my energy would slip into victim and tank my emotional state and honestly, what good would that do?

    Now let me be clear, it is 100% understandable and natural to feel emotionally drained, sad, grief, remorse and even depression after situations like these, especially if it hadn’t turned out in good favour. Feeling this is natural and normal, staying there is not and that is what I am talking about.

    All week long, instead of dipping into the victim LOW and sharing the tragedy of the experience when asked, “how’s your dad doing”, I choose instead to squash that gossip and share how well he’s doing and the miracle that has been received. Keeping my energy focused here has allowed me to keep my spirits high along with the spirits of those around me. I choose the victory vs. the victim.

    In this week’s episode, I share with you 3 additional tips to help you get out of your victim story and step into victory! Check it out and be sure to share it with someone you know that might be struggling!

    Oh, and if you really want to master the art of victory, then check out my Over It Academy by clicking HERE. Enrollment is now open and class starts April 3rd. Check it out and when you are ready, let’s schedule some time to talk. You can snag 20-Min for free on my calendar by clicking here. Appointments fill up fast, so be sure to snag yours today.

    Good Luck this week my friend and until next time, keep being awesome!

    XOXO -BK

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  • Learn to Unleash Your Awesome!

    Morning Friend!

    You know what I think is bullshit. All the reason why you, myself, and others think we are less than, not enough, stupid or we suck.

    I hear it all the time. The lies we tell ourselves to keep us safe and protect ourselves are the same lies that keep us small, stuck, and feeling like crap! But we all do it (self-included)!

    More often than not, these lies manifest in the form of excuses, limiting beliefs, self-deprecating talk, or fear. Without mindfulness these lies will prevent you from ever achieving your heart’s desire, they keep you from reaching your awesome.

    Your awesome is your best self unleashed. In this state of being you become an unstoppable force of good in all aspects of your life. Anything is achievable when it’s believable. But without extensive self-reflection, you are your biggest saboteur of this epicness.

    Your assumptions, past experiences, subconscious, inner-critic, belief system, thoughts, feelings and preconditioning all participate in these lies that keep you imprisoned in your mind.  

    Truly unraveling this will take more than just this week’s video, but it is a great place to start. Check it out and be sure to share it with someone you know who can use the pep-talk.

    If you are like me and the thousands of others who are Over It and ready to get out of your way and end the cycle of self-sabotage, then call me and lets chat. You might be ready to join the emotional revolution we started to transform your life and take back your dreams!

    Check it out HERE or book a 20-min Free Strategy call with me HERE.

    Until next week, make it a great one!

    XOXO – BK

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  • Why Can’t I Get Over It and What To Do

    Haha!! You are going to love the Trooper photo-bomb in this week’s video! Over the years my videos have been invaded by my cat Olive, little dog Bella, but today, Trooper (my big dog) makes his grand unveiling! Oh, the struggles of a real life entrepreneur. LOL

    In all seriousness, this week I am talking about why you can’t just get over it. We all have experienced something painful in our life that seems to plague us for years. Maybe it was the betrayal of a friend, abandonment, neglect, abuse, a bad divorce, a nasty break-up or humiliating experience. Whatever it is, if this experience still haunts you, then this video is for you!

    I remember, not too many years ago, how difficult it was to get over this guy who broke up with me. I played it off like it was no big thing, but my heart was obsessed over it. I was devastated. I felt like he was ‘the one that got away’ and it haunted me.

    I found myself comparing everyone to him, withholding my love from new relationships, and unwilling to be vulnerable again. My mind came up with thousands of altering timelines filled with “should’a – could’a – would’a” scenarios. From the outside, it looked like I had moved on, but on the inside, I had anything but.

    So why couldn’t I get over it?! Why was I trapped in a mental prison over this guy, who in retrospect wasn’t my ideal match?! Well, it boiled down to a few reasons. #1 because he had ‘abandoned me’ and #2 because my brain hadn’t concluded our story yet.

    Let me explain: As you know from my story, abandonment was something I had experienced a lot of as a child and was something I was very sensitive too. Up until this point, unbeknownst to me, I had never let anyone close enough to me to abandon me. I was always the one who left relationships before I became to invested… except for this time. He left me before I had a chance to come up with reasons to push him away and thus he triggered my old abandonment wounds.

    This sparked all kinds of unprocessed emotional garbage; loop them all together, and it kept me stuck in an emotional prison. Sound familiar? Yeah, yuck! Old shit, causing new shit. But that’s how it works.

    So what did I do to “get over it?” Well, lots of things that all accumulated to lots of self-work. Yep, I had to do a tremendous amount of work on my old-shit so that it stopped causing new shit. “I’ve already worked on my shit” you say. I get this! And trust me I do, but I’m going to be the bearer of “bad” news; if you haven’t gotten over it, there is still more work to do.

    In reality, we ALL still have work to do, no matter what stage you are at in your life. And the more you do, the better you get at it and eventually self-work is something you grow to LOVE and deeply appreciate. Want to learn how to make this your truth? CLICK HERE, reply to this email or schedule 20-Min FREE with ME by going HERE and let’s talk about making this a reality for you!

    Wishing You All The Best,

    With an open heart,

    BK

    PS: Enrollment for the Over It Academy Ends April 6th! Do NOT miss your chance to join this life altering, MindFu mastering, self-love acquiring bad-ass personal dev course! We only have 21 more spots available before we close the doors. Call me. You deserve happiness and it’s here for you when you’re ready.

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  • Breakthrough YOU with these 3 tips!

    Good Morning Friend!

    Man, what a wild and crazy week it has been here in Northern CA. The weather has been nonstop rain, storm, flood warnings, damn issues, levee scares and more! If you are from the Nor-Cal area, I hope you are being safe out there! During all this weather crisis, I am reminded of how grateful I am. Seems opposite, as most people are on the edge of their seats in fear, and in certain moments I share this with them, but in the grand scheme of things, I am grateful.

    I am grateful that the levees are holding, that the damn didn’t break, that I have a roof over my head, food in my belly and plenty of room to be a safe haven for my friends and family who are in higher threat levels than I am. See, tons to be grateful for!

    I share this shift in thinking and my commitment to keeping my emotional energy high as a perfect example of the #1 tip I share in this week’s video. It can be oh so easy to keep our energy focused on what’s wrong, what’s missing, and trapped in fear. But what good is that doing? It isn’t helping me feel better, nor is it ‘fixing’ or ‘changing’ the crisis that is at hand, but by shifting, it is allowing me to have more peace of mind and clarity to make the best choices I possibly can.

    Currently, I have friends who are weighing out the storm in areas that might flood, others who heeded the warnings and headed for the hills, some that are non-stop worried and upset, and others that are just grateful that their families are safe. Out of all of them, who do you think is having the most peace during this time? You guessed it! The ones who choose to focus on what truly matters, in spite of the risk of losing everything.

    I send this as a reminder that whether you are dealing with the Nor-Cal water crisis, So-Cal flooding, massive snow storms, loss, separation, acting out kid, addiction, or any other life altering drama, that it is your choice to keep your energy trapped in the drama, or allow peace to invade your heart. I encourage you this week to discover a bit more peace in one form or another. To find the ‘silver lining’ in the hardship you face and allow grace to enter your world. By doing so won’t fix the issue, nor will it solve the problem, but it might allow you the space to see a new opportunity, all while bringing you a bit of relief during this difficult time.

    Check out this week’s video to discover more Breakthrough YOU tips and techniques, and if you are ready to truly breakthrough YOU and start living YOUR best life, then call us and let’s see if my OVER IT Academy is right for you.

    Until Next Week, Keep Being Awesome,

    Bonnie Kelly.

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2 thoughts on “Vlog

  1. Lety Espinoza

    Bonnie, just wanted to let you know I look forward to your Monday videos and love to make time for them no matter what I’m doing! Keep educating us on these very important topics so we can live a fulfilled life.

    Reply
  2. RUTH S

    Cassie…thank you for sharing your grief. You were very brave to do so!!! Definitely shows your movement-forward through the process. Again, thank you!! :0) Both of y’all – have a blessed Thanksgiving!

    Reply

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